Brought to you by asap and The Associated Press, The Slug tastes pop culture for you — just in case it's been poisoned. E-mail us at [email protected].


Wednesday, October 31, 2007

It's Been Nice Knowing You

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(AP Photo/HO/Disney/Gene Duncan)

In the year since launching The Slug, some unimaginable stuff occurred within the realm of popular culture. Anna Nicole Smith died. "Survivor: Cook Islands" divided their tribes by race. Bob Barker retired. And we blogged about it all. We hope we kept our original promise to "simultaneously investigate and celebrate all thangs pop culture." Even if you don't think we did, well, we've totally had a blast trying to, anyway. Remember folks: Help control the pet population. Have your pets spayed or neutered.

"Dancing with the" Most Shocking Elimination

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(AP Photo/HO/ABC)

Wow. The Slug didn't see that coming. On one hand, we're TOTALLY SHOCKED about Sabrina Ryan's dismissal on "Dancing with the Stars." Obviously, she was consistently the best "celebrity" dancer on the show. On the other hand, enough seasons of "American Idol" have made us jaded enough to know that these talent competitions are merely popularity contests, which is ultimately a shame. We're thinking it's probably time for Cameron Mathison to pull out at that thong. Otherwise, he's a goner.

Happy Halloween from The Slug!

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(AP Photo)

It's the day we've been excited about and/or dreading for months! Today is both Halloween and the death of our pimp: asap, The Associated Press' premium multimedia news service. Celebrate this bizarre day with this YouTube link to Tim Curry's performance from "The Worst Witch." For those of us privileged enough to have had HBO back in the 1980s, you can't deny you squealed fervently every time this came on.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Favoritiest TV Show Finales

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(AP Photo/HO/HBO)

In honor of asap's ending, The Slug would like to present our three favoritest series finales. Instead of selecting cliffhangers, we only chose shows that wrapped up their series accordingly. Sorry, "Twin Peaks" and "Models Inc." We loved your conclusions, but you just didn't do that. Here's who did.

"Roseanne." Just when we began to forget that Roseanne Barr was totally bananas, she ended her sitcom with a wordy monologue revealing that the last few seasons — arguably, the worst — were actually fiction penned by Roseanne Connor in her basement. That Roseanne! She could even make our jaw drop at the very last moment.

"Six Feet Under." What better way to end a show than to kill off every major character? In a montage set to Sia Furler's "Breath Me," the fates of the Fisher and Diaz families were revealed in creepy flashforwards featuring everyone's death. Those last few minutes were just like the previous five seasons: tragic, beautiful and totally morbid.

"Buffy the Vampire Slayer." Yes, the whole "empowering young women everywhere" thing was slightly trite — as was needlessly killing off a few key characters. However, nothing could be more awesome than the destruction of the Hellmouth, which leveled the entire town of Sunnydale, right up to the cheesy "Welcome to Sunnydale" sign.

"Dancing with the Stars" Goes Off-Beat

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(AP Photo/HO/ABC)

Wow. The "Dancing with the Stars" judges were really nice considering the ballroom was littered with missteps (and farts, apparently) last night. Despite some highly entertaining routines, The Slug spotted boo-boos from Sabrina Ryan, Cameron Mathison, Jennie Garth and Marie Osmond. What are they gonna do when they have to learn two dances in one week!? Hmmm. We suspect Jane Seymour and Helio Castroneves will be in the bottom two tonight — with "Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman" being dismissed.

"The Amazing Race" is Still Redonkulously Fun

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(AP Photo/HO/CBS)

"The Amazing Race" is still, well, amazing. Spoiler alert! The Slug just finished watching a screener for the 12th season premiere, which follows the 11 teams from Los Angeles to Ireland. This year's race begins at the Playboy Mansion. Naturally, our favoritest team is Kynt and Vyxsin, a goth couple from Kentucky. Yes, they're slightly bizarre — but they're also lovable and totally underestimated by their competitors.

Of course, it wouldn't be "The Amazing Race" without a bickering couple. This year there are two: Jennifer and Nathan and Lorena and Jason. The best moment of the first episode is a challenge where the contestants must lead donkeys along the Irish countryside. One of the more annoying teams mercilessly suffers with an extremely stubborn ass. We promise you'll be braying with delight at their misfortune.

Loose Ends

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(AP Photo)

Look out! asap's endingstravaganza has begun! The Associated Press' premium multimedia news service is nearing its final hour with content all about conclusions. Online now, you can find a list of great literary outcomes, a story about the death of indie rock, an essay discussing the end of a meal and videos about the finales of wars and movies. Stay tuned. Later today, The Slug will reveal our favoritest TV finales.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Changing the Channel

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(AP Photo/HO/Fox)

Most fall TV shows have either settled into their timeslots or disappeared altogether. (Bye, "Nashville" and "Viva Laughlin"!) This season, The Slug's digital video recorder has been so heavily weighed down with new and returning programming that we've had to toss a few overboard to keep chugging along. Here's the four shows we've downgraded on our DVR so far this season. Oh, in case you were wondering, we never started recording "Cane," "Big Shots" or "Life" in the first place. 

"Prison Break." Two episodes of that Panamanian hell house were enough for us! Everything that happened during the first two seasons to the Schofield brothers was seemingly dropped, so The Slug decided to invest our time in new shows instead of staying locked up with the twists and turns of "Prison Break."

"Journeyman." Technically, we're still DVRing this "Quantum Leap" look-a-like so we can catch every second of the "Heroes" preview, but we not actually watching Kevin McKidd bounce around the 20th century anymore. We love the oh-so-moody opening credits of "Journeyman." The plots that follow 'em? Not so much.

"Moonlight." Will that human reporter and vampire private investigator ever get together? We'll never know because somewhere around the third episode, it dawned on us that "Moonlight" didn't feature enough of "Veronica Mars" alum Jason Dohring and it's possibly the most boring vampire show ever. Yes, even moreso than "Dark Shadows."

"Bionic Woman." This one pains us the most because it was one of our favoritest pilots from the new fall TV season. Unfortch, "Bionic Woman" has lost her momentum over the course of the first five episodes. The dialogue is clunky. The action is  slow. And her kid sister is more annoying than Dawn from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" ever was.

The Beginning of The End

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(AP Photo/HO/Lucasfilm)

Boo! As you may or may not have heard, The Slug's pimp — asap, The Associated Press' premium multimedia news service — is scheduled to die this Halloween. We're fairly certain asap is taking The Slug with it to the netherworld, so we're gonna spend the next few days looking back and examining the ends of thangs within the pop culture universe (as will all of asap). Don't get weepy on us just yet. The end isn't really always the end. Just ask George Lucas.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Favoritest Photo of the Week: Boo Bear

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(AP Photo/Paul Sakuma)

Normally, we're not big fans of zoos, but we're staying objective for the selection of our Favoritest Photo of the Week. Nothing this week has simultaneously put The Slug in the Halloween spirit and made us say "awwwwww!" more than this grizzly bear stuffing her face in a jack-o-lantern. Carve out the original caption:

Kachina, a 4-year-old female grizzly bear, eats treats as she plays with a pumpkin at the San Francisco Zoo, Wednesday, Oct. 24, 2007. The bear treats are part of the Zoo's annual Halloween "Boo at the Zoo" and "Dia De Los Muertos" celebration. (AP Photo/Paul Sakuma)