The Slug

"Survivor" Embraces Affirmative Action

(AP Photo/HO/CBS)

We totally called it. The biggest oh-no-they-didn't twist in "Survivor" history lasted two episodes. Although, The Slug supposes, the ramifications of dividng the tribes along racial lines will coninue to affect future alliances. We already saw that last night when the Caucasians and the Asian-Americans of the newly formed Aitu tribe voted together to oust Latino hottie Cecilia Mansilla. Let's see what Cecilia thought about all this.

The Slug: Hello Cecilia. How did y'all feel when the tribes were integrated?

Cecilia Mansilla: It was such a kick in the shin. We were not ready for that. You know, we spent the morning making the place pretty. Billy was gone so we fixed up the place. I was floored. We really needed at least another challenge to show the other tribes that throwing the competition to get Billy off was a good decision.

TS: Do you still think it was a good idea to throw the competition to get Billy out?

CM: I've been thinking about that in terms of the numbers. It most likely wouldn't have made a difference because if we would've won, Stephannie or Nate from Manihiki would be going home. It wouldn't have helped me. But I noticed that Yul said I was physically weak given that we did such a bad job at the last challenge. But if Billy was still around, he might've switched so I don't know.

TS: I liked that one of the first things you did after you integrated was tell Candice about Billy's secret love for her. Why'd you do that?

Terrell Owens Didn't Commit Suicide

(AP Photo/Ron Heflin)

We're not sure what to believe, but we definitely learned a few thangs from Terrell Owens' it-was-just-an-allergic-reaction press conference. 1.) Don't put your pills in a drawer and let your publicist find the empty bottle. It'll probably lead to confusion. 2.) Maybe a cocktail of generic Vicodin and some all-natural supplements is not a good idea. No matter how bad your hand hurts. 3.) Don't forget to smile for the camera!

Nobody Puts Lifts in the Corner

(AP Photo/HO/ABC)

Dear "Dancing with the Stars,"

We don't care what the lawyers say. And we don't give a flip about international ballroom dancing rules. If competitors like Mario Lopez and Joey Lawrence, both fit and upstanding young men, want to do lifts during their dance routines, you should let them do lifts. Come on. It makes for good television.

Go on and let A.C. Slater and Blossom's brother throw their dance partners up in the air. Let those ladies twirl around on that chandelier and fall back into their big strong arms. Let them do "Sonic the Hedgehog" backflips off those staircases. (BTW, where do those staircases lead, anyway?) Encourage them to orbit ABC Studios like they're inside "The Matrix." If anything, so we don't have to see Carrie Ann Inaba make her angry face.

Attempted Suicide? Terrell Owens? Really?

(AP Photo/Bradley C. Bower)

Gasp! Terrell Owens reportedly attempted suicide. Details are just now begininng to emerge, but when the Dallas Cowboys receiver, who once caught a towel-dropping Nicolette Sheridan on "Monday Night Football," was asked by rescue workers "if he was attempting to harm himself," Owens stated, "Yes," according to police. Shocking. How could a guy who has so much want to give it all up?

Take Fido to Texas

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

If you're looking to become a hotel maid, don't mess with Texas. That's because Houston, San Antonio and Austin top the list of North America's most accommodating cities for travelers with pets, based on the number of pet-friendly lodgings included in the latest edition of "Traveling with your Pet: The AAA PetBook." Houston has 108 pet-friendly accommodations available, including three five-diamond hotels. Yeehaw! Here's the top ten. And here's a podcast about the booming business of pet travel. And there's a photo of The Slug's Welsh corgi.

1. Houston
2. San Antonio
3. Austin, Texas
4. Albuquerque, N.M.
5. Phoenix
6. Dallas
7. New York
8. Orlando, Fla.
9. Nashville, Tenn.
10. Tucson, Ariz.

Disney Dreams a Little Dream

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

Remember that giant invitation we received from Mickey Mouse a few months ago that led to widespread hysteria and mass speculation? (OK. Maybe just the last one.) Well, we got another invite today for another announcement in the Big Apple. This one is strictly small and, well, not as mysterious. At the event, Mickey and company will reveal more of what's going down during their "Year of a Gabillion Dreams" promotion — although most of the prizes, er, "dreams" have already been disclosed. They'll also preview their new "Finding Nemo" musical. Oh, and refreshments will be served!!!

Slugshots: What Do You Expect from a Breakfast Burrito?

• Maybe one of them can put together this darn HENSVIK.
• What about an elephant ringmaster?
• Well, somebody liked "Brothers & Sisters."
• Score! Fifty-one grams of fat in a burrito for $2.49.
• Oprah. Nice again!
• Who the hell is Camille Paglia?
• Agreed. But the hair? No so much.
• One out of 16 bloggers don't make their bed.

Billy Crushes on "Survivor"

(AP Photo/HO/CBS)

The Slug just hung up the phone with Billy Garcia, the heavy metal lovin' Latino who was booted from "Survivor: Cook Islands" last night, and we're totally stunned. For some reason, the poor guy still has a major crush on Candice Woodcock, the blonde cutie from the Caucasian tribe. Random! The Slug asked him all about a possible proposal and how he felt about his tribe throwing the immunity competition in order to rub him out.

LISTEN: What did Billy wish would've happened with Candice?

The Slug: Hey Billy. Did you know your tribe was throwing the challenge to get you out?

Billy Garcia: I had a suspicion. But in "Survivor," we all tend to get a little paranoid. So I just wrote it off as being paranoid. It wasn't until the competition that I realized they were throwing the competition. That was one of the all-time lows in reality TV. We're out there and we have to represent our ethnic group and to take a dishonest approach to playing the game like that? Not cool.

TS: What was your reaction to the tribes being split along racial lines?

BG: My reaction was that it's great for "Survivor," but for me as a player, it meant I had little chance of winning. It turned out just like how I thought it would turn out. They saw me as heavy metal. And that's not a traditional Latino type of culture or way of being. Since I didn't have that traditional culture as part of my life -- and they all did -- they felt threatened I would jump to whatever culture I was taking as part of my life, which is heavy metal. So I knew for sure they thought I would jump tribes to the Caucasian side.

TS: Your tribe said you were lazy. How do you respond?

BG: I was in a similar situation as Adam. He had the same strategy that he wasn't going to exert a lot of physical energy out there. I was hoping to have exactly what Adam had. His tribe took the high road and just dealt with it. With my tribe, they took the low road, which is unexpected. You would think with the pressure to represent your ethnic group that you wouldn't go that route.

TS: Did you feel pressure to represent Latinos everywhere?

BG: I think it was evident all the time. I don't think a two-hour span went by where we didn't talk about that pressure to represent Latinos. Christina was the most vocal about it. I'm heavy metal. I don't consider myself Latino because I'm heavy metal. But even I had to admit, I have to represent.

TS: Let's talk about your top-secret love affair with Candice. Are you engaged? Married?

Rosie Has Boring Sex on "Nip/Tuck"

(AP Photo/HO/FX)

The Slug just started getting into "Nip/Tuck" this season. And what a sexy time to start. The last episode feautred Mario "You'll Always Be Slater to The Slug" Lopez as a plastic surgeon not afraid to show his tush. Now, Rosie O'Donnell is getting into the naughty routine. We previewed the upcoming episode guest starring "The View" moderator as lottery winner Dawn Budge, a trashy mama in search of plastic surgery from Pensacola, Fla. (Hey, that's The Slug's hometown. Holla!)

SPOILER ALERT. O'Donnell actually does get down and dirty with Julian McMahon's Dr. Troy for $400,000 at the end of her episode. But during their akward intercourse, she asks the sexy doc if he Mystic Tans his buns and wonders what's happening with Britney and K-Fed mid-coitus. Yikes. Guess she didn't get what she paid for!

Young Studs Win World Poker Tour

(AP Photo/HO/Borgata)

He can just barely legally drink booze or gamble, but 21-year-old Mark Newhouse can — and did! — win the World Poker Tour last night at the Borgata Event Center in Atlantic City, N.J. He captured the $1,519,020 first prize, beating 22-year-old Chris McCormack in head’s-up action at the 2006 Borgata Poker Open. Both Newhouse and McCormack were the youngest players at the final table. Jeez. When The Slug was 21, we were still watching "Full House" instead of making them.